No 1244 of Living Life Series 1
Why do we feel hurt when someone says something we don't fancy? He makes us feel bad and we feel the need not to do what he says or the need not to agree. In a way, we end up doing what he expect or want out of us. That is why there is hurt and the way we handle the situation hurt him as well
Yes, we cannot stop him from doing what he did. But this does not mean we cannot disagree with him. First we must will not to be hurt. Then there is the issue of how to react without hurting him back? How to let him know we hold to what we believe and he can hold to his?
How to live and let live so that all parties are not hurt but yet ready to speak their mind and opinion. One way is to be what we are and he be what he is. Is there the need to hurt one another?
Even if his intention is to hurt us and is centered on upmanship, let us not play into his game and not to play the same game - to be hurt by him and to hurt him back.
Let there be peace in us. Surely this peace cannot be so fragile as to be affected by what he says or do. Worse still is to retaliate.
Do not retaliate. Do not succumb and agree due to fear. We get more hurt that way. Do not feel the need to hurt him back either.
Do not be hurt. Do not hurt back. Show that you do not agree but be nice about this. Smile and let him know you are not offended and you do not go along. He must know this. Show him there are alternatives that don't hurt all parties. Be nice about this.
If this do not pacify him, just be friendly and show this by talking on other issues like how good he was in other areas and how you appreciate him in these areas.
In short, we have the peace in us even if he is hurtful. If we have the peace in us, we want to pacify the ill-will or hurtful nature or ego in him by bringing out the good will in him.
Showing how you appreciate his good side is a sure winner. Of course before we can do this, we must be mindful of what he do and we do.
Learn from the good and the bad in him and turn this to advantage. The good lord Lord Bo Tien 武天菩萨 says we can learn from others. Life is the living gospel and can tell us how to be better in life - not to be upset and not to be carried away.
We can do so if we know the nature of life. The ails of life have to do with the ego. Let us not be hurt by other's ego and let not our ego hurt other's.
Be aware if ego is at work. Know the ego - our own and that of others. Subdue the ego and the noises it make in our mind.
Replace them with silence which to the wise is inner peace but to the ego-driven is hell. They rather go from ego to bigger ego. They create the super-ego in God and in the name of ego upset others who do not go along with them or to submit to them. They gain courage through misusing God.
God is not noisy and he is silent. But in silence there is pervasive peace - unconfined, omnipresent and ever effective to the extent of omnipresence.
We too must be silent and at peace. Then we can absorb the noises of the ego made by others. Our silence with inner peace do make the noises of non consequence and do not add more noises that jar and mar our peace.
If ever, the peace lessens the noise by not adding to the noise. We do not irritate the other party to make more noise. God is silent and peaceful amid the noises of the world. So can we.
Then we will not be hurt and do not find need to hurt. More peace there will be. Peace there must be. We start off by silencing the noises in us for more peace in us. We contribute less noises to the world and do not add to the noises that abound.
Yes, we cannot stop him from doing what he did. But this does not mean we cannot disagree with him. First we must will not to be hurt. Then there is the issue of how to react without hurting him back? How to let him know we hold to what we believe and he can hold to his?
How to live and let live so that all parties are not hurt but yet ready to speak their mind and opinion. One way is to be what we are and he be what he is. Is there the need to hurt one another?
Even if his intention is to hurt us and is centered on upmanship, let us not play into his game and not to play the same game - to be hurt by him and to hurt him back.
Let there be peace in us. Surely this peace cannot be so fragile as to be affected by what he says or do. Worse still is to retaliate.
Do not retaliate. Do not succumb and agree due to fear. We get more hurt that way. Do not feel the need to hurt him back either.
Do not be hurt. Do not hurt back. Show that you do not agree but be nice about this. Smile and let him know you are not offended and you do not go along. He must know this. Show him there are alternatives that don't hurt all parties. Be nice about this.
If this do not pacify him, just be friendly and show this by talking on other issues like how good he was in other areas and how you appreciate him in these areas.
In short, we have the peace in us even if he is hurtful. If we have the peace in us, we want to pacify the ill-will or hurtful nature or ego in him by bringing out the good will in him.
Showing how you appreciate his good side is a sure winner. Of course before we can do this, we must be mindful of what he do and we do.
Learn from the good and the bad in him and turn this to advantage. The good lord Lord Bo Tien 武天菩萨 says we can learn from others. Life is the living gospel and can tell us how to be better in life - not to be upset and not to be carried away.
We can do so if we know the nature of life. The ails of life have to do with the ego. Let us not be hurt by other's ego and let not our ego hurt other's.
Be aware if ego is at work. Know the ego - our own and that of others. Subdue the ego and the noises it make in our mind.
Replace them with silence which to the wise is inner peace but to the ego-driven is hell. They rather go from ego to bigger ego. They create the super-ego in God and in the name of ego upset others who do not go along with them or to submit to them. They gain courage through misusing God.
God is not noisy and he is silent. But in silence there is pervasive peace - unconfined, omnipresent and ever effective to the extent of omnipresence.
We too must be silent and at peace. Then we can absorb the noises of the ego made by others. Our silence with inner peace do make the noises of non consequence and do not add more noises that jar and mar our peace.
If ever, the peace lessens the noise by not adding to the noise. We do not irritate the other party to make more noise. God is silent and peaceful amid the noises of the world. So can we.
Then we will not be hurt and do not find need to hurt. More peace there will be. Peace there must be. We start off by silencing the noises in us for more peace in us. We contribute less noises to the world and do not add to the noises that abound.